so Charlotte Bronte read Emma by Jane Austen and was really interested in this minor character named Jane Fairfax who was poor and would have been a governess had she not married well and then Bronte wrote her own novel exploring the plight of the poor governess who married this guy named Edward Fairfax Rochester in a novel called Jane Eyre and my point is don’t let anyone tell you shit about fanfiction.
scattering stars, mixed media original. available.
They never seem to know really, do they? I shaved my legs dude. I changed my schedule. Why you no stay the night?
I once showed up at a guy’s house who’d been trying to get with me for months, like desperately trying, and I was really hormonal, so I decided to go for a threesome with a friend who’d been hooking up with him. He’d tried to get me to have a threesome with them a few times, but he was kind of a douche (and a little too obsessive for my taste) so normally I would pass, but it was just… one of those nights.
So we show up, and he’s all surprised to see me, and I’m wearing this short dress, and I’m flirty and all that, and he was so incredibly obtuse the entire time. My friend kept trying to turn the conversation onto sex, and he would just ignore her and talk over her like an asshole, so finally I was like, let’s just go. So we left, and he looked all dismayed, but since I was only having sex with him because I was so damn horny, it was probably for the best. He didn’t really deserve it after how he’d been acting prior to all of this. But I still couldn’t believe that he was that freaking dense.
So later on, I’m like, “We should tell him what he missed out on.” So she texts him, and she’s like, “You know you just screwed yourself out of a threesome with her, right?” And he’s like, “How do you figure?” And she goes, “Why the hell do you think we just randomly showed up in your bedroom?”
And there’s this long pause and then he texts back, “FUCK!”
I laughed pretty hard at this. Oh my god, I think I’m obtuse every now and again, but it’s actually just my ego saying I’m mis-reading signals. But that, THAT, oh man, that’s some special sauce right there.
Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore, “Sweatshop-Produced Rainbow Flags and Participatory Patriarchy: Why the Gay Rights Movement Is a Sham”
BAM truth bomb right there and more where that came from if you read the whole article
و مقصود لم ينطق
تضيع الكثير من المحبة
This is also referred to as The Just World Fallacy. If the world is “good and just,” then bad things must only happen to people who “deserved it or caused it.” Except the world is not good and just. And despite individual people choosing to be good and/or just, structures, institutions and systems remain corrupt overall. Primarily through the media is the idea that bad only happens to those who deserve suffering conveyed. Add this to the manifestations of oppression based on gender, race, class, nationality, citizenship, sexual orientation, size, etc. and things like rape culture for example, thrive. And even ideologies that appear “harmless” to some people like prosperity gospel, positivity culture, the law of attraction and American exceptionalism are based on ignoring systemic inequality and focusing on exceptional cases. They stand firm in this particular fallacy.
See, it requires quite a bit from a person to be willing to challenge the world as is. It is psychologically, emotionally and intellectually easier to victim blame. It also helps people protect their psyches from the thought that something bad could happen to them or worse, that they are the causes of those bad things happening to others.
Still…it’s unacceptable. Victim blaming = unacceptable. The right thing to do is listen and support victims/survivors of anything and the oppressed of any form of oppression and work to deconstruct the structures, institutions and systems that make it possible. On an individual level, it requires accountability.
Quote from Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center. This is what is meant by the notion that oppression is not linear. As a Black woman, I can experience oppression by BOTH of their hands and via White men, not only White men. Something else I notice is that while White women are ALWAYS viewed as oppressed and never oppressors, they simultaneously write off Black men as only capable of oppression, when in fact White women, via Whiteness, can oppress Black men. Most of all, because of these dual statuses, both White women and Black men seem to approach Black women as stepping stools to get to White men’s power and as people without our own political needs, thereby existing solely as “support” structures in “their” causes to choose one of “their” sides, versus all of us recognizing differences in oppression with different needs to dismantle it, but all wanting imperialist White supremacist capitalist cisheteropatriarchy gone. *sigh*